Kung lao's answering machine
by tylerssecond2
Summary: Please don't Inflict me for copyright infringiment. You Complain, and demand me to take this down, it's Not ma prolem!
1. Chapter 1

kUNG lAO'S ANSWERING MACHINE…

Kung Lao-hey boys this is Kung Lao, If you're from the Aspca, I decapitated myself with my hat.

Beep

Scorpion-your hat is gay, hah!

Beep

dog-Hey man! I'm the dog you hit with your hat in Mk3, I lost my balls! I called to say Fuck you! You're supposed to be asian but you're Latino!

Beep

George Lopez-You're Latino? SWEET! I can make fun of you even though I am Latino also.

Beep

Liu Kang-Wapah woo cah Whado! hey Kung lao, I did Kitana, but what's a condom?

beep

Kitana-Liu Knocked me up! Kill him.

beep

Dairou-I have a crap backstory, but I wanna be famous, famous, You wanna be the one who's living the good Life!

Beep

Big Time rush-we're suing Dairou because of Copyright Infringement.

beep

Jade-I love you!

beep

Kung lao-why does Jade love…I called myself, Jade was hotter in the movie.

Beep

Bo rai cho- kung Lao, I need your help, I vomited on Li mei, and now she wants to fuck you.

beep

Li mei- Can I fuck you?

Beep

Scorpion-Scorpion, bent on revenge, Never been to mercedes-benz, Throws his spear, get over here, Had a wife, and a son, he's to lazy to buy a gun, spine was ripped, buried in a krypt, Dosen't like Sub-zero, His wife looked like a ho,. Wait, that's me!

Beep

Reptile-MMMMMMM

Beep

Raiden-You copied me! give me back!

Beep

Shang tsung- Chacarron Chacarron, Nuhnuhnuhnuhnuh nuhnuh nuh nuhnuhnuhnuhnuhnuhnuhnuh nuh nuh nuh nuh, nuh nuh nuh nuh.

Beep

Liu kang-Can you fix my voice?

beep

Sub-zero-I just got a sub-zero fridge, I love it! I like to put myself in the ice maker.

beep

Answering machine-no more messages.


	2. Chapter 2

Chapter 2

Hey It's Kung, Leave a message, and I won't get back to you. MMMMMMMMM

Beep

Scorpion-ass.

beep

Morshu-reptile is ripping me off.

beep

Reptile-MMMMMM bombs.

beep

Mileena-I'm pretty, make love to me.

beep

Icarly-We have a crappy show. Nevile and Freddy are gay.

beep

Obama-baraka is my evil twin, Baraka Obama.

beep

baraka-I killed Obama. he sucks cocks.

beep

Taylor Lautner-Let's fight! I'm tanner and more girls like me.

beep

Sub-zero-Heyyyyyy man!

Beep

Kobra-Ken is dead, I shall rise out and take his place, hadouken!

beep

Shang tsung-hello gayboyyyy, Not ma prollem!

beep

Dan forden-you should get a TOASTY! torpedo from Quizno's.

beep

Great Kung Lao-I'm your great great great great great great great great great great great great great Grandfather, And somehow you have the same name as me. You suck! I'm more powerful, I actually defeated Shang Tsung, Liu kang Did and Not you!

beep

mavado-where are my hookswords?

beep

kabal-I took my hookswords back.

beep

Stryker-Liu Kang tried to drop the arcade machine on me, so I told him to try and defeat me in Mortal kombat, I won, And beat shang tsung. I wish I could do that In real Life.

beep

Sektor-watch nightly ketchup! it's awsome.

beep

Kenshi-I got my sight back! But I didn't know Mileena was ugly, I wrecked that chick, No wonder why that BJ hurt.

beep

Jax-I just got a metallic dick,sonya here I come!

beep

sonya-Jax just gave me my first period.

beep

Rick astley-Never gonna give you up, never gonna let you down, never ggonna run around and desert you!

beep

No more messages.


	3. Chapter 3

Chapter 3

Kung Lao-This is Kung Lao, If you're Christian bale, I'm still sorry about the Incident on the set.

beep

Jax-The Klan is after me.

beep

KKK-We're after Jax.

beep

-Buy a honda…wait who are you? AHAHHHHAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHH!

beep

Sub-zero-I killed Mr. Opportunity.

beep

Liu Kang-Hey Kung! Wanna come play!

beep

sektor-Watch Nightly Ketchup!

beep

sektor-Watch nightly ketchup!

beep

Sektor-Are you watching yet!

beep

Jade-Helloooooo.

Kung Lao-Yes?

Jade-Hi baby! Did you miss me?

Kung Lao-Huh?

Jade-You Love me don't you?

Li mei-Who's there?

Jade-Li Mei?

Li Mei-Jade?

Jade-Why are you at Kung Lao's

Li Mei-I slept with him.

Jade-You did too?

Kung lao-Uh…..

Li Mei-Damn He's good.

Jade-I know right!

Kung lao-Talk to each other on another phone please.

Jade-He's sexy!

Li mei-If the 3 of us did it we'd melt the bed cause we're so hot.

Jade-Yeah!

Kung Lao-I'm shutting off the machine.

Jade-Sexy

beep

Quan Chi-Penis!

beep

Raiden-Let's duel at high noon.

beep

Kano-I'm evil, I stole Sub-zero's medallion.

beep

Frost-The medallion! give me the medallion

beep

I killed Frost, Froze Kano, then Watched so much Defenders of the Realm.

Beep

Liu Kang-I'm a dolphin.

beep

Johnny Cage-Go see Dragon fist III, Liu Kang's a dolphin?

beep

Kiwi-I'm a kiwi bird, I'm more powerful than Shao kahn.

beep

Shao Kahn-Damn Kiwi Bird.

beep

Hsu Hao-I'm lame and Mongolian.

beep

Kai-KAI!

beep

Dairou-Hi.

beep

Darrius-My alternative costume looks like Jim kelly, But Reminds me of AfroMan.

beep

No more messages.


End file.
